John Carmack

How to become every programmer's favorite programmer:

1. Write the Doom and Quake 3D game engines.
2. Release the source code for free.
3. Found your own space rocket company.
4. Become CTO of a virtual reality company.

Walrus

Having been reading a bit of Lovecraft recently, I was amused by this silly story from El Reg about a walrus buried in a London graveyard.  Rather than a mad scientist's "walrusoid abomination", it was probably just a bit of medical research. The best bit is at the end when a researcher confesses that it's fairly mysterious:

"...we drew a blank.  There was a reference to Prince Albert riding on the back of a giant tortoise, but unfortunately it wasn’t relevant."

As a commenter says, this statement should be quoted whenever anyone references the results of any research.